I want an official Red Ryder, carbine action, two-hundred shot range model air rifle!

New York

We would like to thank KRATOS1971 for this spectacular poem!

It’s amazing how badly this makes me want to skip Christmas. I get your intentions Dickie, but there is no Christmas joy being conveyed unto me by this.

Nebraska

Even the Wise Men do their Christmas/Birthday shopping at Walmart. I wonder if he was able to get that Zhu Zhu pet for Baby Jesus.

Utah

Yeah, I assume that I would have upgraded to a new ride by now too. Calling out all those reindeer names every time you need to take off would get old as sh*t.

Florida